Spring ’13

Wow, I’ve really been out of it for awhile.   I was just going through April’s photo library, and shockingly there’s nothing there.  Not one single picture cropped, edited or uploaded.  Dismal.

Despite my lack of words, we’ve been pretty busy this spring. I signed the children up for swim lessons, Lukas started baseball and received his first holy communion, and one of the grammies came to visit. Some other things have happened, too, but they’re kind of downers so I’ll just go ahead and omit posting them here.


Here is a photo of Lukas on the big day. He looks so grown up, I can’t get over it.


All the children made a communion banner and they were strung up all around the church that day.


A shot of the oldest boys in the group.


Lacking a few children in this shot but still one of my favorites.


With Father.


Afterward there was a little reception with cake, tea and juice. It was very nice, and it was a beautiful day for all of it. This is the four of us outside the church.


And with grammy, who came all the way from Ohio to witness this occasion.

More to come!

Easter ’13

It’s been awhile since we missed Easter service, but after much debate, we changed up our plans. I know what you’re thinking…Lukas is about to go through his 1st communion, it was unwise to pick this year, but the fact of the matter is that Lukas has been to Easter service many times, and he and I have talked thoroughly about masses, our faith, and more. I think it was an okay decision. We spent last weekend at Palm Sunday service, and since Joe begrudgingly trekked to our church with us, we decided to go to his on Easter.


This is Joe’s church. Nature is his sanctuary and I’m okay with that, and I’m okay with exposing my children to it, just as I expose them to other religions, faiths and doctrines.


And God was all around us.


Everywhere.


This photo reminds me of the story of Moses and the Reed Sea.


Here is my handsome son who is growing up so fast that I can hardly believe it. He really enjoys these hikes and getting out and enjoying nature and I’m thankful for that since we’re outdoorsy people. His gaming love doesn’t inhibit him and I know I’m lucky in that regard. I hope that the day never comes where he’ll prefer to stay home with his xbox.


And then later this happened, but that’s a whole other story. (Just now getting used to his new ‘do. I miss that hair of his. *Sigh* Some parents get mad when their kids grow their hair long, but we get mad when our kids cut theirs.)


We had to head back after this, as we were expected at my brother’s house for Easter dinner.


Aunt Cari & Uncle Brett got Ava an awesome ice cream cone shaped bubble wand. Here she is with her cousin Morgan getting the bubbles going. It was a beautiful day in Colorado and it was nice to spend time outside.


Grandma got Ava the super cute barrette in her hair. She had to wear it.


We have a star softball player in the family, so Lukas decided to take his ball and glove so that he could practice with her. Because of his arm, Lukas can’t throw and catch the way normal kids do, so he’s forced to catch with his right hand, tuck the glove under his left arm to pull his hand free, remove the ball and throw with his right hand. Sound complicated? Surprisingly (or not so surprisingly given the things this kid has worked through) he’s already got the hang of it.


Here is Uncle Brett giving Lukas some pointers. He’s a big baseball fan. Big. Huge.


Here is Morgan with Ava as she puts together her Lalaloopsy puzzle (just moments before Ware broke his leg on the big screen -awful). She loves puzzles. A lot. In fact she’s doing one right now as I type this.


And here….here are my children as they are exposed for the first time to Just Dance 4. This was after Cari and I had a dance off, of course. A great end to a great day.

Coloring Eggs & Growing Up

The kids and I colored some eggs this morning. Lukas is pretty much over the whole Easter Bunny thing (thank God, shhh), but he still enjoys coloring the eggs and I think that’s nice. We had a good time, just the three of us.

Lukas hid all the eggs for Ava and she ran around trying to find them. It was adorable. When she hid them for Lukas he found them almost immediately, of course.

March Madness


More snow today. Oddly, despite being under a severe winter storm warning only, we’re experiencing blizzard like conditions this time around opposed to a couple weeks ago when we actually had a blizzard warning. Visibility today was much less than a mile and we’ve accumulated more than even the last storm.


Luckily the snow brings lots of opportunity for neat photos.


Unfortunately I’m a big wuss still and didn’t want to venture too far. Plus, I need a new camera and boots that will slough off the water instead of soaking it up and making my toes frozen little beans.


Walking into our local restaurant was tiresome for the children. Ava was rather vocal about it saying, “I don’t love this weather!”


It’s not so bad in the car, though, with the heater on full blast at 90°.


Tomorrow is Palm Sunday. There will be no parading through the sidewalks with our palms, I don’t think.

Finding My Dancer

Last night at Ava’s lesson, while sharing a step stool with one of the barn cats, I casually watched another lesson at the other end of the arena.  The rider was a young girl, quite lithe and graceful, riding bareback on a lovely bay with all the skill in the world.  Her instructor (also my instructor) was seated in the corner, doling out commands and praises, and sometimes reprimands.  As I watched this young rider I was completely entranced by the way she looked on top of that horse, and found myself wanting to be like her; a silly notion given the span of years that separate us (possibly twenty, or more).

In the grand scheme of horsemanship I am but a mere beginner with so little knowledge that I couldn’t possibly judge the skill level of another rider just by watching. All I have ever known about horses is just to get on and ride. There was no skill involved, no communication with the horse, and my horses were most often tacked and ready for me from the get go. I had no relationship with the horses, no insight into their minds or impulses. If a horse wanted to do something it did it because I had no solid understanding of how to handle a horse properly and be the leader a well trained horse needs. They took advantage of me, probably because I was taking advantage of them by just coming along for the ride without learning much about them first.

After my first few lessons, my instructor found a command that my body responded to without any help at all from my brain. She calls to me, ‘find your dancer’, the second I begin to get sloppy and somehow it works to correct every postural shift, every lazy stride, everything. She asked me, once, what I did when she called that command because as soon as she does, my entire body shifts and transitions into that ‘dancer’.  I gave a brief ‘I don’t know’ with some vague explanation, but the truth is that I don’t know. I don’t know. It just happens. It’s just natural.

Once I was a dancer. My body was trained to be graceful and fluid. I was once light footed and sure of myself, coordinated and posturally perfect. I was never thin, never gifted with the body of a dancer, but I was built, and toned.

At my first lesson my instructor mentioned my natural poise on a horse and I had explained to her that I had ridden before and that I had been a dancer for many years when I was younger and that my posture had been meticulously honed as a result.

My last lesson was the most moving for me. I found my dancer and posted my trot as though it was natural, for more than just a beat or two, for the first time in my life, and it was so cathartic that I don’t even think I can put into words how I felt in that moment. Like Wally and I were one and we were moving together in harmony. We were happy together and it was exhilarating. Like no other feeling I’ve ever felt before. No pleasure ride, no crazy gallop around the ring, nothing compared to this feeling. Having felt that, and hearing my instructor’s praise, gives me hope that one day I can be like the girl on the bay I saw last night, moving in graceful bareback harmony with my horse the way she was with hers.

One Year

It’s been a year since we moved from Las Vegas to Colorado and we’re nearing the end of our first winter here.  Hard to believe it’s been that long.  I love Colorado so much, I can’t imagine living anywhere else, now, and I am ever thankful for being given the opportunity to get here.  I am finally living.  I’m finally happy.  I’m doing things I’ve put off for years, I’m exploring new things, taking chances, it’s a whole new world and I will never, ever leave.

That said, I’m surprised to find myself missing some aspects of Vegas living.  One thing I miss is convenience.  Whoa, do I miss convenience.  Country girl to city girl back to country girl.  It’s been a huge adjustment.  Fourteen years of all hours city life really screwed me up.  Just last night Joe called me saying, “Man, things close early here.”  By early be meant 5PM.  I miss Japanois at 2AM, and I miss late evening business hours.  I miss liquor being sold in grocery stores and, I swear to God I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I miss that smell of hot asphalt.

But the biggest thing I miss?  Wearing flip flops in March.  I’ve worn socks and shoes for three months now and I’m fucking over it, man…ugh.  My feet are super soft and callous free; perfect for summer, but no one can see them because they’re beneath layers of socks since no matter how hot I keep the house my toes won’t get warm!

I know it sounds like I’m complaining.  I can hear all of you saying, ‘You wanted cold and snow, quit yer bitchin”, but I’m really not bitchin’.  I’m just expressing how this huge change has affected me.  I was a desert rat for fourteen years, okay?  I’m not used to this cold shit and it’s exhausting cleaning up the copious amounts of mud and snow from my floors when the dogs go bananas in the yard, because it doesn’t snow and stay around, no, it melts almost immediately and there is nothing left but sludge for the dogs to track in.

And the kids are so over the snow.  Oh, they love it when it’s happening but even Ava is getting tired of it.  They haven’t been to the park in awhile and for two kids who could park it up year round, this has been a big change for them.

It’s weird to see pictures of my girlfriend’s in Vegas with their tops down, cruising the streets in a sweatshirt and flip flops while I’m bundled up here in the mountains in at least three layers because it’s still chilly to me (meanwhile locals are wearing shorts because they think 50° is warm -wtf?!).  Everyone says that next year I’ll be more acclimated.  Well, I certainly hope so, cause 60° is still pretty damn chilly to me.  It sure is a nice change when it’s been nothing but snow and ‘feels like -7′ when I wake up in the morning, but it ain’t no short and t-shirt weather, that’s for sure (yesterday it was 58° and I saw a woman walking her dog in a tank top -mind.blown.).  Whoa, that’s damn cold, folks.

Still, I wouldn’t trade it for anything.  Not even flip flops in March.  I can’t tell you how nice it is to, for once, look forward to spring.  I haven’t looked forward to a change in seasons in…I don’t even know how long, because there was no change in seasons!  It was warm, and it was cold.  That was it.  The transition from winter to spring in Vegas was something I usually dreaded.  The coming spring meant long days of 80 degree weather that led way to 100 degree weather from which their was no escape.  Want to sit on the deck in the evening?  Better have misters cause otherwise you’ll DIE from the sweltering heat, and even then it’s still pretty damn uncomfortable.  Still 90° at midnight?  Of course.  And that’s where the problem lies.  Not that it was 100° that day, but that it was still 90° at midnight.  There’s no real cool down for several months straight.

I’m sooooo done with that.  So, so done.  If cleaning up mud for days, wearing socks and boots for three months, if enduring frigid morning temps means never, ever having to experience 90° at midnight again, if it means being able to open my windows most of the summer, I’ll take it and this will be the last entry, ever, about the weather in beautiful Colorado.